Life As I see It

एक रोज़ ज़िन्दगी के रूबरु आ बैठे ,
ज़िन्दगी ने पूछा दर्द क्या है, क्यों होता है? कहाँ होता है ये भी तो पता नहीं चलता
तन्हाई क्या है आखिर, इतने लोग तो हैं फ़िर तन्हा कयों हो?
मेरा चेहरा देख कर ज़िन्दगी ने कहा मैं तुम्हारी जुड़वाँ हूँ, मुझसे नाराज़ ना हुआ करो
- Gulzar

Mood: Philosophical

These are the most apt lines I found to describe my current feelings towards life.

Staying at home was pleasant as always is. Met my sister and brother-in-law, relatives etc. One good thing I did at home was to scan all my old family pics, got a scanner on rent and scanned almost all the pics at home, it was an idea of my brother-in-law and I'm thankful to him. It was great to see the old pics again including my parents wedding album and some of their pre-marriage pics.

But since coming from home, i have gone into a contemplating mode, my mind has become a churning machine spatting all kind of junks, i have turned a semi philosopher ... My two best and beautiful friends are moving and i have already started feeling the void they'll leave behind in my life.

Somethings are hard to believe, when u have spent six years with some one and shared a special bond then it is obvious you'll miss them. Only change is constant [i usually forget it, but this is the ultimate truth of life], how easy things will be if man remembers this. I always have had confusion over few things, never understood whats right or wrong.

One thing I have learnt is life is grey and not black and white. Its unfair on YOUR part to expect people to behave same with you over the years and that leads to the thought "never expect in relationships and u will be happy" .. and you will really be happy if you follow this, this is the reason western people are so forward, no expectations, divorce is a common thing there, no issues, no grudges, children leave their parents at an early age and maybe that's why teenage crimes are high there, social fabric of West has a different color and texture than that of East. In India as i see it, society does play an important role "No man is an isle", I read it in my 10th class poem, I understand it now. Whats important to consider is what do we have achieved by expecting from relationships, its the values which matter to me at the end of the day. And I personally believe a relationship cannot grow without expectations. Its a trade off, either be happy and live a hollow life or enrich your relationships and taste the real flavour of life.
I just don't understand why we Indians are losing our values? What are we chasing?

Social fabric in India is very strong and dominating , its like imaginary ether permeating every sphere of your life, and if you feel suffocating, your problem. I remember telling my mom when I was in college that I don't at all care about society, what I care about is only those people I love, to hell with everyone else, I'm still standing by this but now there's 1% doubt in my believe, let me see how much dilute it gets over time.

Here in s/w industry, we organise knowledge transfers for less privileged ones, but who will give me a KT of what my parent's know and I don't. My father knows his relatives up to 4th degree, and I don't know even half of my 2nd degree relatives. He knows how an X person living in Y area of the town is related to W person from Z area, simple two people in their respective generations married each other at some point of time, whats difficult to figure out is hows our generation related to above two generations.

There is one more thing I could never decide on , William Wordsworth said "Good walls make good neighbours", i never could decide how true it is .. some one help me. Its perfectly OK to give people their space but whats the limit, I'm confused. Then there is something called trust, my friend penned her thoughts on , read here.

Ending this post abruptly coz don't know what to write more. Sometimes it happens I just don't feel like doing anything, I sometimes enjoy being alone with mother nature.

Life is beautiful yet complex or is it the other way :-)

Posted by :ubuntu at 3:55:00 AM  


Vaibhav said... 11/4/07 1:04 PM  

I am not agree with this statement

"One thing I have learnt is life is grey and not black and white."

Life is sometime black and sometime white. Both are the true flavor of life, you can't mix them.

ubuntu said... 11/4/07 11:50 PM  

vaibhav what i meant by this is that life never gives you choice as clear as white and black , life is smudgy.

Pravesh (Pravy) said... 12/4/07 4:38 AM  

Too good!! I don't have much words to appreciate that..

When have became a philosopher dude!! :)

Really nice one!

esirah said... 13/4/07 2:00 AM  

Hi Ubuntu,

On the color scheme of life, I'd have to agree that there tends to be a lot of gray. For me personally, I have spent a lot of time in the "fundamentalist" black/white mode... but no more really. Things just aren't that simple ... at least not to human perception. The more I live the more I find that things I once "knew" the answers to have fallen into the "gray". Is there still black and white? Yep. But mix a little of both, and guess what you get...

Interesting comments about the west vs east btw. I think the key difference is that in the west 'individualism' is touted more ... where in the east it seems to be all about community and security in the group/family. In cases where one mimics the other, we tend to cross those boundaries and look a little more alike. That goes both ways I think... and is probably good for both of us if we keep our senses.

ubuntu said... 13/4/07 9:30 AM  

Esirah thnx for your comment. I'm not saying western world is inferior , it is all a matter of perception.
We are right at our side , you at yours.

esirah said... 18/4/07 6:15 PM  

>I'm not saying western world is inferior

Nor was I thinking you had said such. Sorry if I came across as defensive or something. Was not my intention... I had no desire to say one is right or wrong or any such thing. I see the value of both sides and think that both cultures would do well to learn from one another.


ubuntu said... 19/4/07 11:44 PM  

Hi esirah ,
I'm too sorry if u felt bad over my comment, i too had no intension of any such action.
Btw thnx for posting a comment

Jaya said... 22/4/07 7:02 AM  

For a moment I imagined, life is more of black than white or grey(never believed such a shade existed). Stand by someone, trust someone and they let you down. This post does echo some of what I feel at times...I like it :-)

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